I used to coach swimming to kids. I started when I was 18 and continued doing it until I was thirty-four. When I was a law student at age twenty-three or so, I realized something that bothered me. I knew that if I continued to coach and interact with between 80-150 kids every single year, it was only a matter of time before we lost one of them at far too young an age.
A few months later, I got a call from my parents back home telling me about one of my swimmers who had died in an automobile accident. My realization had become a reality. A seventeen year old girl was dead at far too young an age.
This post is not about her, though. This is about Greg, the subject of the second such phone call I received. This call was last week.
Greg was the oldest of four boys. My fourth year coaching, I met Greg as an eight-year-old. He was very tall and thin. He did not start out being an exceptional swimmer, but then again most people don't. They get better from practicing. As the years went by, Greg improved. His brothers joined the team as they got old enough to do so and their family was one constant we could rely on. Greg was a backstroker and during the last year I coached him, I believe was the backstroker on a state champion medley relay. He was a smart kid. He always liked to read more than play with the other kids. Even his younger brothers were much more social than he was.
Last week I got a call from a friend who still lives back home. He left me a voicemail message telling me that Greg had passed away. He knew none of the details, but had just seen the obituary in the paper and thought I would want to know. I knew it must have been a suicide considering the lack of details. There was no accompanying story about an automobile accident or no phrase about a "lengthy illness."
I had not seen or spoken to Greg in several years. The odds are that had he lived I never would have seen him again. I'll still miss him though. He was a good guy and I just think it is very sad that he decided to shoot himself the day before his twenty-fifth birthday. I think it is sad that he spent his last day feeling so hopeless.
Here is a picture from a better day. Greg is the one on the right.
A few months later, I got a call from my parents back home telling me about one of my swimmers who had died in an automobile accident. My realization had become a reality. A seventeen year old girl was dead at far too young an age.
This post is not about her, though. This is about Greg, the subject of the second such phone call I received. This call was last week.
Greg was the oldest of four boys. My fourth year coaching, I met Greg as an eight-year-old. He was very tall and thin. He did not start out being an exceptional swimmer, but then again most people don't. They get better from practicing. As the years went by, Greg improved. His brothers joined the team as they got old enough to do so and their family was one constant we could rely on. Greg was a backstroker and during the last year I coached him, I believe was the backstroker on a state champion medley relay. He was a smart kid. He always liked to read more than play with the other kids. Even his younger brothers were much more social than he was.
Last week I got a call from a friend who still lives back home. He left me a voicemail message telling me that Greg had passed away. He knew none of the details, but had just seen the obituary in the paper and thought I would want to know. I knew it must have been a suicide considering the lack of details. There was no accompanying story about an automobile accident or no phrase about a "lengthy illness."
I had not seen or spoken to Greg in several years. The odds are that had he lived I never would have seen him again. I'll still miss him though. He was a good guy and I just think it is very sad that he decided to shoot himself the day before his twenty-fifth birthday. I think it is sad that he spent his last day feeling so hopeless.
Here is a picture from a better day. Greg is the one on the right.
Oh yeah, and the Yankees suck. I know Greg would agree.
ReplyDeleteMaybe the idea of our nation slowly falling under the grips of socialism was too much for him to take.
ReplyDeleteI've coached a few dozen kids in soccer over the years, and I figure sooner or later the same will happen to me. Considering one of those kids was my younger brother, I really hope it doesn't hit that close to home.
Or, maybe his family didn't have a lot of money, and since they charge by the word in an obituary, they kept it short. This, of course, was info I wish I had known before I wrote my dad's obituary. I might have trimmed a few things.
And Greg was a wise kid. The Yankees do suck, as do the Dallas Cowboys.
ReplyDeleteSteve, I added a photo that you might appreciate.
ReplyDeleteThat is a great photo.
ReplyDeleteDid either of those guys get their wish?
I don't know the answer to that. I do not even know where the photo came from except that I stole it from someone else's blog.
ReplyDeleteSo which one is Greg?
ReplyDeleteah man.. sorry to hear about this. but this is a great post. and i love the pic. i too, feel sad that his last day was spent feeling hopeless.. :(
ReplyDeleteSteve, I already anticipated that question when I posted the photo. That is why I specified that he was on the right.
ReplyDeleteSnow- thanks.
I know he's on the right, but who's right? The cameraman's, or Greg's?
ReplyDeleteAnd at the risk of sounding like a smartass, maybe he wasn't feeling hopeless. Maybe he was simply cleaning a firearm and it discharged. I know of a guy (a friend of a friend) who did that, shot himself in the leg, hit the femoral artery, and bled to death before he could seek help.
I won't go into detail, but the facts suggest it was not an accident. I have known of people to shoot themselves accidently before.
ReplyDelete